I came across it today while rummaging through my box of “not everyday” jewelry — the stuff that I keep for special occasions, particular outfits, or for sentimental purposes.
It’s a simple, slim trinity ring. Three interlocking bands of white, yellow and rose gold. Cartier it ain’t, but it’s obviously inspired by the design.
It was given to me by a boyfriend from university. I don’t wear it anymore.
Don’t get me wrong: I still like the ring an awful lot. And I no longer have any feelings whatsoever for the ex, not even the idle curiousity of wondering what he’s up to these days. Honestly, if I passed him by in the street, I probably wouldn’t even recognize him.
However, I still don’t feel right wearing it. I’m married now, and adore my husband (who, by the way, has given me some stunning and thoughtfully selected jewelry over the years). And I just do not and can not feel comfortable wearing jewelry given to me by another man (other than dear old dad, of course).
But I can’t bring myself to throw it out or give it away. Why? Because I LIKE the ring, dammit. If it weren’t for my own reticence, I’d probably wear it often.
I know that the solution is just to buy a similar ring for myself and to quit bellyaching. And I do intend to get around to that at some point, when my fiduciary responsibilities are not quite so daunting. In the meantime, however, the ring has really gotten me thinking about the emotional baggage that jewelry tends to carry, and how a piece of jewelry is never fully free, for good or for ill, of the person who gifted that item.
Do you have any pieces of jewelry that you keep but don’t wear, for similar reasons? Or do you immediately perform a symbolic exorcism on all of your jewelry the moment the door closes behind an ex?
How much baggage do your baubles have?